All parents are concerned about spoiling their children, but you can't spoil a child through love. Love is imperative so that a child knows they are wanted. Too much love is in fact impossible. A child needs adults to play with, to teach them, and to offer protection.
A parent's responsibility is to give a child love, a secure environment and encouragement. A child will not succeed at everything they attempt. Listen to their problems, and try to understand what they are going through. Talk openly with them when they have setbacks and disappointments. Children have to learn how to handle failure and frustration.
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| If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters very much. - Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis |
However, always keep in mind that showing love to your children isn't the same as letting them do, or giving them what they want. It is important to set limits with your children. Setting limits is actually very important, because it gives your child a sense of safety and security. Parents might at first be afraid to establish rules, because they risk upsetting their kids. But without rules to follow, kids do not have any guidance. They feel lost. Rules that go unenforced are almost as bad. The proper response to a broken rule is one that explains the rule, along with an appropriate punishment. Children need to know consequences for their actions. All children are not the same. Your approach may have to differ depending on how the child reacts to a rule. One teenager who comes home too late may be convinced that what he did was wrong because you stayed up late worrying about him. Another might not get the message until his curfew is severely reduced. What matters is setting definite boundaries, and giving good reasons for them.
Children should never be afraid to tell you anything. Treat them with love and respect, and they will do the same. Raising children is difficult, but also one of the most rewarding experiences you can ever have. Love your kids, and give them a safe home full of reasonable rules and expectations. It will set them on a path to turn into a good adult.
2011 Moira G Gallaga©
